What Makes a Great Hostess Gift?
Q: I'm going to a dinner party with relatively new acquaintances and I want to make a great impression with my hostess gift. Any suggestions for appropriate host or hostess gifts?
A: What makes an appropriate hostess gift? The most traditional gift is a bottle of wine or liquor. However, the classiest gifts are those that aren't required to be opened right away. Unless you know the wine you chose will go with the dinner, let the wine choice be at the host's discretion. In short, don't be offended if your wine gift gets put on ice--after all, true host or hostess gifts are meant to be a token of appreciation intended for the evening's organizers, not the attendees.
Feel free to branch out as well. Gourmet food products are usually a big hit, and you don't have to worry too much about whether you've chosen the host's favorite. If they're not crazy about chocolates or wild about Italian dipping oils, they can use them as hostess gifts at a later date. (This form of regifting is largely acceptable, as long as the recipient doesn't regift back to you or at an event you're attending.)
Other great host/hostess gift options include flowers--a fun choice, as long as no extensive rearranging is involved. Many etiquette guides recommend that you send the flowers a day early, but this type of gesture is often too formal. Bringing flowers or a plant directly to a gathering is usually just fine and very much appreciated. While some classic hostess gifts include guest towels, decorative items like candles, or even fancy soaps, these are becoming more uncommon.
Hostess Gifts for the Morning After
A new classic is the breakfast gift. Wrap up muffin or scone mix with some gourmet coffee and/or tea. This way, you're fulfilling the true purpose of the host/hostess gift by giving something that treats your hosts. Give them a way to make the post-party cleanup fun with breakfast or snack items for the next day. Best of all, this type of gift is as inexpensive as it is classy.
The modern solution is to stick with consumables, and be sure to let the host know that you don't expect them to serve your gift right away. You can either tell them with the gift ("This is something for you to enjoy after the party" will usually suffice), or attach a note to the gift. The traditional signal used to be gift wrapping; a wrapped gift was to be enjoyed later. However, as etiquette rules have become more relaxed, other guests don't always follow this rule.
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